his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
