ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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