She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
