i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
