Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
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