Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
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