Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
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