shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
