Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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