sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
