I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
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