: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
