then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Dick very happy bro
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Randomize