we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
He did a backflip because drugs
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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