another moral hangover. fuck.
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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