I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
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