Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
