thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
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