so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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