when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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