haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Randomize
