I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
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