I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Randomize
