I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
