Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Randomize
