I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
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