Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
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