soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
