i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I just googled if crying burns calories
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Randomize