Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize
