he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
