So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
