I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Randomize
