So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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