Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
