You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
