he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
Randomize
