is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
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