I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
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