Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Two words: blizzard sex
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize