Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Randomize