So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Having a random hookup so left but love u
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
