But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize