I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
People in love make me want to vomit
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
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