Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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