Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Randomize