The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Randomize
