i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize
