My brain says no but my pants say off.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
