thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Randomize
