I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
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